Taking Turns

I started work this week and was definitely ready. Working for me has always been a purpose and what I enjoy. As there have been alot of changes this summer, it was good to finally find that groove that I would be in for a regular schedule as I am more efficient with my days!

I no longer have over an hour commute one way to work and a twenty minute drive in seems like I have more time in the world than anything in the mornings. I have an amazing gift each morning: I can see my family. Previously, I was already at work by the time my kids were rising in the morning. My husband was responsible to get them up, dressed, and to school. There were alot of days it crushed me not to see them in the mornings or to have to video call to say hi to them. I was never that mom that dropped her kids off at school, then went to work sort of a person. It was always Dad. And honestly, he did great, but I know it wore on him.

In addition to the time given back to me with a short work commute, I've noticed this week the "taking turns" or changing of the guard in our house. I drop the kids off at school, my husband picks them up and back and forth we go each day. I go to the gym, he goes to the gym, I make dinner, he makes dinner and it works. Because it has to. I work and he works. We both have things we need and want to do. At this point in our marriage and military lifestyle, we know what works and how we need to survive. Because we've travelled down that road before. We've seen uneven divide of responsibilities or time away. I don't think either one of us is selfish if we want time to work out or run some errands or meet up with someone. We have to take care of ourselves to be able to care for our children. It would always frustrate me when you would hear other women making comments about another mother who wanted time to work out and how she was selfish and didn't think of her kids. I think the comment stinks because she will come back a more energized, refreshed, and happier mother to get her time she needs to herself and will be better at being mom upon her return. Kids don't notice that hour you are gone or when you are running when they are sleeping or playing with toys. The mom guilt has to stop and we need to take care of ourselves, period. Taking turns as partners in a marriage is the way it should be, but I realize it's not always that way for some. It wasn't that way for me growing up and I saw the burden it placed on my mother. Taking turns to give your partner a break, the kids a break, share responsibility and make the household run are so important. Our system isn't perfect, but, it works for us ( and for now). I am grateful to have a partner that takes turns and can help me. Sometimes he does a much better job than me and that's okay :) The military life changes quickly so this probably won't last for ever and I know that. I will embrace the time I have, the turns I get. He will be gone for days, maybe weeks or months coming up and it will be just me running the show. Just me trying to figure out how to get my time after taking care of work, children ,the household, etc. I've been there, done that, and I know what is expected of me. I can do it and am able to do it. For now, I will enjoy the view and the moment :)

~Until next time, Amanda